Gone (again).... Alone Again, naturally...

Did I anticipated it too much that it came to happen or it was really bound to happen and I can't do anything about it but to wait in vain?!

Yes, it happened. She said that she has to leave me (again) with no definite reason. She said that there are people who doesn't want her to be happy and she can't do anything about it.

What about love? I guess love is just a word... an overrated one.

But then, didn't I wrote on my previous blog post that I am still on the "wait and see" mode?! Does this mean that I am not hurt?!

Unfortunately, I am still very much hurting right now. After all the preparations for this moment (as I saw it happening), here I am again bewildered and lost. I guess there is no preparation enough for this kind of hurting.

The good things is "Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional." For now, I'll enjoy the pain... but tomorrow... or the next days to come, I know I'll suddenly become numb, either of too much pain or the will to feel nothing, I'll go numb.

This time, how I wish that when I go numb... it would cripple my badly battered heart forever.

Here she goes again...

Remember that "ohsoquickshotfromthemoon" relationship I had the last time?

We're at it again. After the breakup, we stayed as friends... and along the way we were able to get to know each other better than when we were "on".

There were times then that I'm starting to wonder how come everytime she has this big problem, I'm the first one she'll call or text and ask for help. She has a boyfriend then, so I was baffled.

It turns out that the breakup was a blessing in disguise. It opened doors for us to know each other well and it somehow nurtured the feelings that was left after the breakup.

The comeback started with some sweet messages like "I love you friend", or "miss na kita lagi dude". Oh well, to make the story short... it was actually her who first said "I love you, sincerely" to me.

Who the hell doesn't heard of the maxim "Love is sweeter the second time around"? Well, love is indeed sweeter for us this time. Noticeably, she is sweeter.. and kinda more concern. What is she now is a far cry from what she was then...

But wait, I am still cautious about all the bliss and happiness I am going thru right now. Honestly, she's still too volatile... unpredictable in anything. Her ex-bfs are whooing her again and lots of suitors are already lining up.

But then, I must say that I am really inlove with her. Right now, I'm still trying to go thru a "wait and see" mode and hoping for the best, expecting the worst.

I guess with all the past heartaches I've been thru, I am a bit smarter now yet still relatively stupid.

Let's see what's next...